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               W E S T E R N  U N I O N  T E L E G R A M

TO:  JEHOVAH YAHWEH                   [Illustration:  a man covered with
                                      hair wearing sandals pointing to
CARE:  CELESTIAL HOTEL (SUITE #666)   two gravestones reading "O Man Of
                                      Faith," with the legend, "Apostle
PRESIDENTIAL TIER, PARADISE           Zarathud.  A balloon reads, "You're
                                      right, son!...It would be a _waste_
                                      of your kind of talent to go into
DEAR GOD;                             the security business!"]

    THIS IS TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR CURRENT POSITION AS DEITY IS

HEREWITH TERMINATED DUE TO GROSS INCOMPETENCE   STOP   YOUR CHECK

WILL BE MAILED   STOP   PLEASE DO NOT USE ME FOR A REFERENCE

    RESPECTFULLY,

MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER/OMNIBENEVOLENT POLYFATHER OF VIRGINITY IN GOLD

POEE HIGH PRIEST